It's like you aren't supposed to yell BORING when your kid is telling you about their day.
— Oh Susanna (@the_mom_dot_com) November 4, 2013
If we're in a car and I love the song on the radio and you turn it down to tell me something, please know that I now hate you.
— Gillian Hearn (@CUTEBABY017) January 13, 2014
It's like we're all ignoring the fact that Sylvester Stallone's face looks like soft serve ice cream.
— Puggy McSugarButt (@LuvPug) January 14, 2014
Double Dragon is my favorite game about 2 colorfully dressed gay brothers who try to come to grips with their sexuality via street violence.
— Joel Danger (@joeldanger) December 16, 2013
Lasagna is just spaghetti flavored cake
— Jake (@plethoricjake) November 24, 2013
If a tree falls in Robert Plant's woods, do the forests echo with laughter?
— Wile E. Quixote (@ScottLinnen) November 17, 2013
RT if you have sinus congestion and can't smell what the Rock is cooking.
— Mediocre Marvel (@eliserose5) October 7, 2013
Is there a man on the planet that doesn't point the stud finder at himself during a DIY project?
— Olivia (@aveuaskew) July 11, 2012
JELLYFISH CAN EVAPORATE ALL OTHER FACTS ARE POINTLESS
— NOT A METH LAB (@jenlaw_11) July 10, 2013
Zach Morris could stop time & never grabbed a handful of Kapowski? U know Screech would touch a Turtle titty the second he said "Time-Out".
— Randi Lawson (@RandiLawson) September 24, 2013