Inadvertent Death By Technology

by - September 19, 2009

It's crazy what happens to people when technology fails. And by people I mean me. My heart starts to beat a little faster, my cholesterol rises high enough so that God wonders what that red line poking through His floor might be, and my face takes on the colors and lines of a veteran alcoholic.

I mean, are we all crazy to put so much trust into a machine? Into an object? Because I do. On a regular basis. I trust that my computer is going to work when I turn it on. I trust that my iPhone will do every awesome thing it is supposed to do. And even though I logically know that at some point everything will fail, when it happens it's like I have been cheated on. It's like "What the fuck? Who do you think you are freezing on me? What are you trying to say by dropping my calls asshole?"

And then once all the heavy breathing and heart palpitations are over, the void sets in. The void that blocks your rational thought and makes you believe that life as you know it has come to an end. I put my life into that THING, and this is how it repays me? What is wrong with this picture? It wasn't too long ago when I did not own a cell phone. Or a computer. I got by on the human form of 'telephone', you know, the game that is as ancient as talking through a tin can? And now every high school student has a cell phone, if only to call their friends to tell them exactly what they are doing between classes, and to firm up plans to meet out front in five minutes. Oh! And that guy totally just checked out my butt!

My point, I guess, is that even though it is completely irrational to rely totally on technology, I would not have it any other way. Change is about moving ahead with the times, and I would rather sit at a table with a bunch of nerds talking about the latest in video game consoles and Mac operating systems then to sit there and talk about...well really, what else is there to talk about?

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