My Dirty Secret

by - January 24, 2011

I am ashamed.  I did something this weekend that I feel bad about, and although I came out in the open about it, it does nothing to alleviate my feelings of shame and regret.  What did I do, you ask?

I ate some icing.  

That icing right there.  Ugh.

Let me give you a little background on this:  

Right before I went on my cleanse, Dave and I bought stuff to make cupcakes.  You know, to allow me to enjoy one last fling before I committed to a month of food celibacy.  Now, I HATE buying icing, I would rather make it from scratch, because if there is a container of that stuff anywhere in my house, I will find it and consume it all until I am bloated and experiencing a bad case of sugar shock.  I just can't help myself.  

But we bought a container.  And Dave made me promise that I wouldn't eat any...not only for me, but because he wanted us to make more cupcakes once my cleanse was over.  He also said something along the lines of "I love you, and I will not enable you to kill yourself this way".....thanks Dave, glad to know you care.  Also, LAY OFF the A&E channel would you?

So I promised.  Crossed my heart and hope to die.  And THEN I ATE SOME.  This came about on Saturday night when Dave told me he was going out for the evening to his friends house to watch the fight.  He left, and I left my body in an out of this world sugar coma experience.  Oh my goodness the icing.

He called me when he was on his way home later that night.  I quietly and shamefully told him I had a confession to make.  Our conversation went like this:

Me: So, I did something bad.

Dave: Okay....what did you do?

Me: Ummm....I ate some icing.  Like a lot of it.  While I was watching Sex and the City, which makes it even more terrible.  And the worst thing about it all is that as SOON as you said you were going out for the night it was the first thing that crossed my mind. I PLOTTED eating the icing before you were even out of the house.  I am sorry.

Dave: (silence).  It's okay least you told me about it, and that's the first step in the healing process.

Maybe I DO need an icing intervention. 

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