Flem-y Goodness

by - February 06, 2011

So I had been having a bad week at work.  Nothing in particular happened, just one of those weeks where you are hyper aware of the fact that you DO NOT BELONG THERE.  Ugh.  It comes and goes.  Every once in a while being there becomes unbearable and then I think paycheck, food, clothes, fancy hotels, possible car?, house? whatever, and then I have a good cry and get over it.  

Usually the feeling disappears by Friday afternoon and the thought of two full days of office monkey freedom.  I wanted to do something that night.  But you know when you make plans to do something, and there is a voice in the back of your mind saying 'don't do it, just go home'? Yeah, I should have listened.  On account of having no money and no friends, going to a bar and getting ripped and dancing my face off was out of the question. Then I remembered that I had money left on a gift certificate for a car rental.  So before I could think long and hard about it, I clicked 'reserve' and it was ours.  

I wanted to to go and pick up the camera that my dad was giving me.  He told me it was mine about a month ago and I have been itching to get my hands on it ever since.  So we decided to drive to our hometown and pick it up.  Now, my parents are on vacation so I felt a little like I was teefing from them, but I thought it would be smooth sailing.  But, naw.

As soon as Dave picked me up I could tell we were in for a party. We were both hungry, tired and dare I say it? BITCHY.  We weren't fighting with each other, but since we are both girls we feed off of each other's feelings because we are all sensitive like that.  We were on edge.  You know when people grind their teeth together and smile and talk calmly?  We were kind of like that.

We arrived at my folks' house and of course, the camera doesn't work.  Because I am hungry and tired I can't handle this.   In my minds eye, I can see myself throwing a temper tantrum screaming "WHY doesn't it work?  Yes but...WHY doesn't it work?  I see that but WHY?".  Right.  See myself doing that.  More like it happened.

Dave convinced me to just bring it home and we would fiddle with it there.  Did I mention that the drive is about an hour?  Did I mention it felt like a huge waste of time?  Did I mention I was hungry?

So we went to Diary Queen to eat.  Ugh.  Bad idea.  So gross.  And not only that, we had to eat in.  In my hometown.  I HATE my hometown.  The second we moved there when I was 17 I started counting down the seconds until I could leave.  It's small, there is nothing to do, and it is small-minded.  Dave was born there.  I am surprised he is normal.  

I couldn't help but look around at all the couples who were spending Friday night there.  And it took me back to when I was younger and I would go there on Friday nights with my boyfriend at the time.  And it started to feel like the Twilight Zone. Like Dave and I still lived there and we were just going out for a cone on a Friday night.  Everyone always does the same thing.  Because there is NOTHING fun to do.  Nothing.  And I had myself feeling all weird and twisted and as if I had gone back in time.  Maybe it was my starvation brain talking.

Anyway, it was crap.  The food energy helped a little to pull us out of our funks, but not really.  The weird Twilight Zone feeling continued on the drive home when I felt like we were driving to Toronto not to go home, but to hang out for the night.  WTF?

Favourite quotes of the night:

While listening to a girl in the booth behind us yell about all the sordid details of her obnoxious life, Dave couldn't help but notice the look on my face.  The look was a 'holy shit the people in this town...' look.  He called me a snob.  I stated that I was glad I was a snob about that place.  People who stay there get sucked into this alternate universe and never want to do anything good with their lives.  I said:

"The longer we stay here the dumber we get.  Hurry up and finish your fries".

In response to finishing his ice cream and all that diary making him have to clear his throat constantly:

Dave: Ugh.  I keep needing to clear my throat.

Me: Ah yes, all that flem-y goodness.

Kind of encapsulates the evening for us doesn't it?  Waste of money on a car rental, waste of time driving there, broken camera, and feeling like we had gone back in time in a bad way.

Ah yes, all that flem-y goodness.

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